Author: alicewgold

I would like to state that I am a brunette, but now I am a mix of grey, white, brown, and blonde. I would also like to say that I am 150 pounds, but that would be a boldfaced lie. How about I say I am work in progress because that is the truth? A beautiful work in progress. I love the sound of my fingers tapping on the keyboard and my greatest hope is that something that I write will lift someone else on their journey.

I’m a brunette, she’s a brunette, why not?

Thanks to Andrea, a new blogging friend (love those) for this fun quiz. I have to say that I am quite proud of my result. Now, if I can just make LG come up as Brad Pitt, life will be perfect….especially if we could adopt about 4 more international children. (seriously)

I was so worried my result would be Rosie O’Donnell or Roseanne Barr or some other chubby actress.(both would be complimentary because they are FUNNY and that is way more important to me than looking all glam) I guess I should have known that they weren’t skinny enough to be included in the database. Our entertainment industry is all about the skinny minnies. I guess it is so fun to actually believe that I could be one of them for a minute. Now,I am going to go and eat a healthy breakfast.


Take the Quiz

Who are you? Go here.

Free Hugs

I found a new blogging friend….Mindi at wordtoyourmother. (And those of you who are prudish – you know who you are – consider yourself warned – she is more liberal than you)

Here is the youtube video of the year that she just posted. I love it…it touched my heart. I am normally not a huggy person, but I may have been converted. Powerful stuff here.

P.S. Mindi, I didn’t just give you this shout out because of your Omgirl post. Believe it or not, I read hers after I posted this one. It’s a weird weird blogging world…we are all a bunch of sheep!

Flavor

Thanks to Lindsey for a fun quiz.

You embody the perfect blend of sweetness and seduction. You personality is just as luscious and irresistible as chocolate ice cream. You have a flirty, melty attitude that’s easygoing and delicious. You appreciate luxurious, extravagant things, like the way ultra-soft fabrics feel against your skin.(this is pretty much the only part I agree with) Some people want to hog you all to themselves, but you find ways to make everyone feel special.

Prom Night

Look at what I spotted downtown on Saturday night.

A baseball playing kid who thinks he belonged at prom back in 1979.

Wow! I wonder if his date approved of his “statement”.

Maybe she should have called in Taylor Swift to pick her boyfriend as her publicity stunt.
It is so nice to be 32 and comfortable in plain old clothes that are comfortable. (oh and I just re-read this and I am 34, not 32 – wishful thinking, I guess)

The more you *art

As I have told you before, we weren’t allowed to say the far* word while growing up. That is why I called my writing contest a stinkin’ contest, and not a *art contest. (That is just for you mom, now don’t read ahead because I am about to offend you)

I have managed to get out from under the control (and manners) of my parents, so I can now say fart. And, I can say that I was so happy to read all of your fart stories. Passing gas is indeed a funny thing, even if only a few of you entered my contest.

Many of you, misunderstood the contest rules (I will forgive you this first time, since a lot of you are new bloggers, but next time I will only consider those who actually post the story on their own blog AND leave me a comment with the link) I feel like I am forgetting an entry, but because everyone didn’t leave me a comment on my post, I may have inadvertently missed your link here. – Sorry, if that is you – please let me know and I will update)

A HUGE THANKS to all of you participants: (I so enjoyed reading your funny stories)

Renee with her Oliver/Nanny story. (just in a comment)

Chrys with her first fart while dating story. (also in a comment)

I really enjoyed everyone’s stories, but I chose the winner by who made me laugh out loud the hardest and longest.

And the winner is SHEILA.

Why? Because her story so could be something that would happen to me. If you wonder what I am talking about, you will have to read her story. (And, not to discourage future participants, but I have to admit that I can be biased towards the blogger who is the most faithful commenter)

The runner up is Jarrett. His story made me laugh the 2nd hardest. But, even if I did laugh the hardest on his story, I must admit I just can’t pick Jarrett the winner. I have a HUGE conscience that makes me feel really bad for that poor kid on the bus that he let take the wrath for his own flatulent fuel…poor guy, he is probably still in therapy to this day! Nonetheless, it’s a funny story.

So, congratulations Sheila. I guess I will be mailing a whoopy cushion to your friend who inspired your story. And, I am sure it will be one of the most proud moments of her life! You know, besides the time that she pooped her pants at the store while trying to out fart her hubby.
Sheila – e-mail me at alice.w.gold@gmail.com with her name and address and I promise to get her prize out within the next week.

Little People
And look and what I won from the greatest crafty blog out there!
Cally is a mad woman. She made this one REALLY hard.
I am proud to announce that I guessed her 7 Brides for 7 Brothers correctly.

And, even though, my stinkin contest prize is so, well, stinky
compared to Cally’s handcrafted little people,
I will shortly declare one of you the winner….stay tuned…I am still working on the post.

Thou Shalt Not Murmur
When no matter what, I can’t force myself to write, I shall post church signs.
(And when you people out West have bad blogging days,
I would really like to see what you come up with for interesting church signs)


So, my life is out of control.
Living the gospel consumed every waking moment and
even many of the sleeping ones last week.
After the weekend, I thought I would be rested….
And, I admit that I was mad that my husband and I didn’t get (nor still haven’t gotten) 2 minutes to ourselves to celebrate the good bar news.
(I mean you think after 10 years of married college life and still succeeding at having three children , we would have figured out how to steal away 2 darn minutes?)
So, what did I do in response to our craziness?
I had a weak moment and murmured to a friend this morning.
So, what did God do in response to my murmuring?
He took away those protective “your car is 10 years old angels” and he let my minivan die!
Man, I should have read these church signs more carefully last week
and been happy with our lives of service and not angry and resentful.
So, yes, I am going to learn from my mistake.
Instead of saying, “Holy CRAP what am I going to do this week without my car?”
I am going to choose to say, “Wow, God is so good to me. I am so grateful to have one car that both my husband and I can share this week. What would I do without that one car to carpool my kiddies, my hubby, and myself to ALL the places I need to go in preparation for the Ward Picnic I am in charge of on Friday?…Oh, I am so blessed to have that one little car.”