Church Signs


Two weeks ago in Sunday School
we talked about King Agrippa.
I think I relate with him
when I say
“Almost thou convertest me.”
Thank you Marta for the facebook share.
Southerners: I need your eyes.
Pretty pretty please take pictures of church signs for me.

What I love about Mormonism

If you know me personally
or have been reading my blog
for any given amount of time
you are right to guess
that this is going to be a long post.
There are so many reasons
I love my church.

I love The Church of Jesus Christ
of Latter-day Saints.
There are so many reasons why,
but the main reason is that is makes so much sense.
Intellectually, I have not found another religion that answers my questions
about the universe as well as mine does.

Another reason I love my church is
I believe it to be exactly what it claims:
The Church
Jesus Christ.

My 18 months as a full-time missionary
teaching people about the gospel of Jesus Christ
harbor some of my fondest memories.

Lately, the Mormons have been receiving a lot of national attention
due to Pastor Jeffress’
claims that we are an Un-Christian cult.
(btw – this is not a new mindset.
Many people agree with Jeffress)

I thank the First Baptist Church of Mayview
for their disagreement
in church sign form.
You know how I love the church sign.

Here is another Baptist church sign.
It’s not as supportive.
Yet it’s funny.

I was recently impressed with this news story in Knoxville.
Thank you to WATE and my favorite reporter Josh Ault
for reporting the Mormon side of the issue.
Normally in the Bible belt,
Mormons aren’t given much of a voice,
so this story was emotional to me.

All kinds of people have stepped up
to stand with the Mormons
in our claim that we are Christian.

Some of my favorites have been
a Catholic reporter from Florida
who claims to not have attended church in 45 years,
but says 
even though he could never 
give up coffee and alcohol to become a Mormon
if in need of spiritual guidance
he would
go to our own
spiritual giant
over some judgemental
and closed minded Baptist preacher any day.
(his own words)

Each of these stories were touching to me.
You see, I lived in Knoxville TN
for the past 8 years of my life.
And every day I had to defend my claim
to be a true Christian.

It’s not the first time that politics have brought attention to the church.
I recently heard JFK’s address from
way back when at
the Mormon tabernacle in Salt Lake City
and fell even more in love with the man.

A while back I sent an e-mail to a friend about my beliefs.
I kept feeling God nudging me to do so. 
It didn’t turn out so well.
She got upset with me and I felt really bad.
I don’t go through my days trying to offend people,
but I do try to follow the voice of God on a daily basis.

After her e-mails condemning me and my church
I took comfort in the verse of the Bible that talks about
how Christ was persecuted so why should we not be persecuted for His sake?

I can honestly say that I don’t know of any church out there
that  today receives more persecution than mine?
It’s funny because in a way that is an even greater testimony builder for me.

I know I open a can of worms here,
and I know that I lose readers on my blog
because I talk openly about my faith,
but I choose to lose readers
because when this life is over
and God asks me about my blog,
I want to look at him with a clear conscience
when I say that I tried to make every aspect
of my life a testament to Him.

Here are some of the doctrines I love the most about my faith, straight from The Holy Bible.

1 Peter 5:22(Mine is the only church that I know of that no one receives any money for filling a ministry) aFeed the bflock of God which is among you, taking thecoversight thereof, not by constraint, but dwillingly; not for efilthyflucre, but of a ready mind

John 20:17 (Jesus and His Father are seperate) Jesus saith unto her, aTouch me not; for I am not yetbascended to my cFather: but go to my brethren, and say unto them, I ascend unto my dFather, and your Father; and to my God, and your God.

John 17  (Why would Jesus pray to His father if they weren’t distinct individuals?) The Intercessory Prayer

Amos 3:7 (God designed a pattern of dealing with his children on earth by calling prophets if he is the same forever why would he change that?) Surely the Lord God will do nothing, abut he brevealeth hiscsecret unto his servants the dprophets.

1 Corinthians 15:29 (baptism for the dead – do you know any other church who practices it)  Else what shall they do which are abaptized bfor the dead, if the dead crise not at all? why are they then baptized for the ddead?

1 Corinthians 15:40-41 (three degrees of glory compared to the sun moon and stars – any other church you know of talk about this) aThere are also celestial bodies, and bodies terrestrial: but the glory of the bcelestial is one, and the glory of the cterrestrial is another. There is one glory of the asun, and another glory of the moon, and another glory of the bstars: for one star cdiffereth fromanother star in dglory.

Hebrews 5:5-6 (Do you know any other church that has the lesser priesthood Aaronic and the higher priesthood Melchizedek?)And no man taketh this ahonour unto himself, but he that isbcalled of God, as was cAaron. So also Christ glorified not himself to be made an high priest; but he that said unto him, Thou art my aSon, to day have I begotten thee. As he saith also in another place, Thou art a apriest bfor ever after the order of cMelchisedec.
Malachi 4 (this talks about the prohet Elijah appearing to open the work of sealing – the hearts of the children turned to their fathers – sealings can only be performed in God’s temple – do you belong to a church with a temple? What if I told you that Elijah already appeared and that this work was already happening preparing the way for the Second Coming? You wouldn’t believe it because it is just way too spectacular, right?) Behold, I will asend you bElijah the prophet cbefore the coming of the dgreat and dreadful eday of the Lord:And he shall aturn the bheart of the cfathers to the dchildren, and the heart of the echildren to their fathers, lest I come and fsmitethe gearth with a hcurse.

Here is another little ditty that has been in my filing cabinet for years.
If it doesn’t get you thinking, I don’t know what will.

The true church must have the same organization as Christ’s Church (Ephesians 4:11-14)
The true church must have a foundation of Apostles and Prophets (Ephesians 2:19-20)
The true church must claim divine authority (Hebrews 5:4)
The true church must baptize by immersion (Matthew 3:13-16)
The true church must bestow the gift of the Holy Ghost by the laying on of hands (Acts 8:14-17)
The true church must practice divine healing (Mark 3:14-15)
The true church must be a missionary church (Matthew 28:19-20)
By their fruits ye shall know them. (Matthew 7:20)
The fruits:
I don’t know of any other church that has grown as fast. From 1 to 12 million members in 200 years.
I don’t know of any other church that gives as much community service or humanitarian service.
I don’t know any other church that has teenage kids that go to Bible study at 6 am on school days worldwide.
I don’t know of any other church with 10’s of thousands of missionaries serving throughout the world at any given time.
I know a whole lot of really good people (the best) who are members of my church.
I don’t know of any other church that is completely run by unpaid volunteers.
I don’t know of any other church that teaches self-reliance and emergency preparedness like mine.
Our church welfare system is a-maz-ing. Heads of states and countries look to it as an ideal.
Mormons are known for their focus on family and the strength of their families.
How about that Mormon Tabernacle choir?

Anyhow, that is probably enough for today. I could go on and on about all the great things about my church. I could sit here for weeks and talk scripture and philosophy, but if I know one thing it is that when it comes to God, nothing can teach a person better than the Holy Ghost. He testifies of all truth. So I will leave you with the testimony that I have gained through the power of The Holy Ghost. I have prayed, fasted, and studied diligently to receive answers from God, ever since I was a kid. My testimony is a culmination of my life’s efforts and with this I will leave you.

My testimony is this
I do belong to The Church of Jesus Christ
I believe that Christ’s original church was lost in apostasy
when Christ himself was crucified and all of his original apostles were murdered.

I believe that this same Jesus Christ, the Savior of mankind,
appeared to a 14 year old boy named Joseph Smith
in a grove of trees in upstate New York in 1820.
Jesus Christ told Joseph Smith to join no existing church
because as prophesied they all draw close with their hearts but not with their hearts.
Christ then called Joseph Smith to be a modern day prophet
and modern day prophets have been on the earth ever since then.
I listen intently to the words of these living prophets and apostles every 6 months
and try to change my actions according to the counsel that they give.
They are truly inspired leaders and testify of Christ in word and deed.

I get mocked for these beliefs,
but I could never deny them
because my religion is true.
The Holy Ghost testifies this to me repeatedly.

We are nicknamed Mormons because we have The Book of Mormon,
The Book of Mormon is a second witness of Jesus Christ
and takes nothing from the Bible but adds to it.
It is through the teachings of both the Bible and The Book of Mormon
that I have tried to build my life on the rock, who is Christ.
One of the scriptures in The Book of Mormon prophesies of a day
when people would say, “Bible Bible, we’ve got a bible”, as an argument
against The Book of Mormon,
but to me all one needs to do is consider that 
The New Testament built on the Old Testament
and think about the hundreds of sects that 
all believe differently from that same Bible
to know that additional revelation is needed for clarification.

I believe that one of the greatest blessings I have
as a member of The Church of Jesus Christ,
besides eternal salvation through Christ,
is that my family has been sealed together
for time and all eternity
in the temple of the Lord.
I can’t imagine living a day
without this knowledge.
It buoys me up
and has helped so many
stand strong in faith
after they’ve lost a loved one.

Most of all, I believe in Christ.
He is my King. He is my Jesus.
He lives. He is my best friend.
He has given me a flawless example
of how to live my life
and he atoned for my sins
by giving His own life.
He thought of me and my struggles
and worries while he bled from every pore
in the Garden of Gethsemane.
He suffered so I don’t have to.
I have witnessed Jesus Christ work miracles in my life
and the lives of many others
and I would be lost without Him,
in this mortal life and in the immortal life to come.

Laugh Out Loud

Thanks to Jennifer
for facebooking  this one
from Crossville, TN.
Living vicariously
here in Utah,
is the only way
I can get my 
church sign fix.
There are so many things I miss about the South.
My in-laws.
My sister.
My friends.
The kids’ schools
and the familiar faces there.

Today I am really missing
Sister Schubert’s rolls.

Yesterday the girls were
making a fuss over a bug that
got into the kitchen.

LG reasoned with them.
“C’mon guys,
you grew up in the South,
this little bug is nothin’.”

I made a mental note
to enjoy Utah’s
a little more.

I am white trash and I can’t be burned.

I am white trash.

I have admitted it before.

I teach my kids about it.

I get all giddy inside when I find reasons to think I am not as white trash as I thought.

I have bragged about embracing it.
Thanks to all ya’ll in the South, who helped me get there.

However, being white trash does not make me void of feelings.
It does not make give me permission to not try and be a better wife.
It does not make me NOT want for more out of myself.
It certainly doesn’t make me unloved.

So, if I am white trash, so be it.

But, you, whoever you are, that loves to call me white trash,
because you think it’s the most hurtful thing you can say.

First of all, you have to do better than that.
And second, I just want you to know one thing.

I know that God knows what you do and you will one day have to answer to Him.
Therefore, I don’t have to worry about it.

And do you know what else?
I love it when I have a church sign that is perfect for the moment.
You can’t touch me because I have sonscreen,
therefore I cannot be burned.

When you sit at your computer and spew forth vial insults anonymously, do you know what it says about you? You are a coward and you have issues.
Why are you obsessing over me?
And why do you feel it justified to kick any of God’s children, even if they are Mormon.

I would be white trash any given day over mean and hateful.
White trash people are some of the best people I know.
It’s the people who don’t admit their trashy parts that I worry about.
And the people who go around pointing fingers at other people for being trashy are especially special.
I poke fun. I speak my mind. I have opinions, sometimes they are wrong. Gratefully, there are people out there who have the guts to take it up with me in person because when they correct me in love (often on my blog) I often find myself wanting to change. And I am grateful when I see the error in my ways because this life is really just one big chance to improve really.

Deep inside I love people, I really do.
And that is why people love me in return.
Let me talk to you for 5 minutes,
I will try my darndest to understand you and I will find a reason to love you.
I probably already have.

Sorry for the rant today, my readers who come over for some funny, but it was merited and anonymous put me in bad mood which reflects on my writing.

Go ahead everyone, feel free to stand with me and admit just one part of your trashy selves.
It’s so liberating.

Today’s admission for this not so fun blogger:

My baby is walking around in a onsie that is covered in brown make-up stains.
I put it on her after getting it out of her drawer that way.
Yesterday after Abigail’s load of laundry was covered in ink stains out of the dryer,
I told her to just go ahead and fold her bras and underwear as nobody is gonna see the stains on her underwear.
I hope I will remember to tell her to wear the unstained ones next time she has a doctor’s appointment.

Oh, and if you happened to miss all the excitement and are wondering why the heck I am freaking out, make sure you read each and every comment by anonymous on this popular post.

I’ll Take My Church With Humor

LG doesn’t understand why I think this guy is funny, but he couldn’t hide his chuckle at The Eye of the Tiger. Lots of Mormons are funny. I recently learned of this funny guy Shaycarl on youtube. He’s a Mormon. He’s kind of obnoxious. He has four kids. He lives online. Wow, it’s like we are long lost twins. Except he is famous and makes his living on youtube and I am only known by my 800 friends on facebook (and only 1/8th of them read my blog) and I don’t make any money. But, it’s all good, I blog for me. And it’s always flattering that anyone actually reads this thing.

Well, you know how I love my church signs. You also know how I love a good laugh. And you know how I get giddy when we combine the two. If you are with me, you must check the link below. It is a great church sign war. And I believe the funny Catholics won.

This is hilarious.

I think that I agree with the Catholics, and not only because they are funny. Rocks will be in heaven because heaven will be here on earth. Why would the rocks have any need to go anywhere else?

Right At Home

I was thrilled when I discovered this little Baptist church down the street.
It made me feel right at home.
I think the Western Baptist’s ingenuity may need some upgrading,
but I will take what I can get.
Do you think that this sign is saying I love you God three times?
Or is it God saying he loves us three times?
Either way I find it ironic 
the sign
is the same sentiment
for the Mormons and the Baptists.
We all love God.
And He loves all of us.

For the Moms

I was asked to write a poem about mothers. I am not sure what is going to be done with the poem. It’s not my greatest work. It’s for my church back in Tennessee. I didn’t have a lot of time, and I really have to be in the mood for poetry. I hope that somehow my main feeling is communicated: I have been mothered by many many women. Some are really my moms and some were friends and some were total strangers.

I will never forget the day that I left the local library bawling. That morning I had just received some shocking and awful news. I decided to take the kids to the library to get my mind off of things. Of course, my two children had other ideas. My baby was a monster that day. They say that our small children respond to our emotions, and I think she was responding perfectly. A man came across the library and pretty much told me I was an awful mother. It was the straw that broke the momma’s back. I gathered the monster, her sister, and tried my best to keep it together until I got outside. I broke halfway to the door.

Another mother had seen the whole thing go down. She ran out to greet me at my car. I had locked the kids in their seats and sat at my steering wheel bawling uncontrollably. I couldn’t even muster the strength to drive back home and even if I could, I couldn’t see well enough to drive. She had the audacity to knock on my window. I sheepishly rolled my window down, and explained that I was having an awful day. She asked me if she could pray for me, and I said, “Oh, that is so sweet, please do.” As a Mormon, I thought that meant she would go back to her car, bow her head and say a silent prayer, but as a relatively new Southerner, I had a lesson comin’ to me. She stood in place and started pleading with the Lord on my behalf. I don’t remember most of what she said except for one line, “Jesus, this woman is obviously having a really hard time, and she has children to take care of, please comfort her so she can do whatever it is that she needs to.”

Do you know that it is six years later and I am still dealing with this major trial in my life. And often, very often I hear the words to that prayer and feel at peace. I wish I could somehow tell that mother, wherever she is, that she has been an angel in my life. But really, aren’t all mothers angels? I think God gets so much of his work done through women with mother hearts. How grateful I am to be one who can succor and to also be one who is succored.

They give birth to babies.
Cradle, not just their own.
A woman’s heart is so large
It’s too big to be alone.
Sometimes are single.
Or have never housed a full womb.
But they still hold hands and hug,
And cry over grave and tomb.
Love and teach.
To everyone they know.
Their children, or mine,
They can’t help but help them grow.
Don’t exclude.
They love one and all.
Because they can’t help it.
They know peace is their call.
I have many.
Lots are far away,
Yet I carry them in my heart,
To get me through each day.
I hear them.
Encouraging my frown.
They laugh with me a lot
And cure me when I’m down.
They are also known as
Sister, daughter, friend.
They are women who I love.
God, to me, did send.
They are busy
Righting the world’s wrongs.
I will, with them, in awe,
Kneel in His eternal throngs.
Work miracles.
In lives old and new.
Because they know how to love.
And succor me and you.
They inspire.
Each person on the earth.
All good things start with them.
Without them, where’s our worth?

Still open

Oh how I am going to miss the good church signs of Knoxville.

Chantay has promised me to e-mail the good ones to me. I thought that was so sweet. It made me cry.

I think I will cry every time I get an e-mail.

For now, I stocked up on some before we left K-town, so stay tuned.

I thought this one pretty funny.