USA
Airline Rap
On Moonlight Bay
Anatomical Energy
Do they really call it mass? Matter? And there is a difference between the two?
Later that evening, while in bed, (we were newly weds who actually waited until we got married, so you can go ahead and wonder why we were still discussing this topic) we decided that Biology might be a better choice for me.
If I could get the babies here,
Well, tonight was the night. Where was my knight in shining armor when I needed him?
Abigail came home from the fifth grade with the confusing stuff.
“Are you serious Abigail? They really teach you this stuff in fifth grade?”
No wonder I was so lost in the 11th grade. It was the first time I remember ever seeing the material.
Well, I am honored to tell you that the stuff is still confusing to me.
Abigail tried to be humble. O.k. not really.
“Mom, it’s so easy. Will you just test me on the stuff?”
“Um, yeah, sure.”
Here is where my explaining stopped.

Me: “Abigail, there are two boobs in California. I think they are kinetic, um, I mean potential energy.”
LG just got home.
He says that the answer is: Boobs create energy.
The future is Glee
We all live a life of music and humor. We live our own little whacked out musical.
I want you all to know that I try to be a good mom. Tonight, I at least started the show with the disclaimer to the children that they could watch Glee as long as they understood that it is wrong to have sex out of wedlock and it’s morally wrong to be gay.
Sidenote: I love you gay people, but I won’t budge on the correctness of the gospel principles. You gotta live the commandments. I was born as a bitty and it is not o.k. for me to go through life lashing out at people justifying it’s OK for me to hurt everyone around me because I was born that way. – Oh man, I can see the comments a flowing – can’t wait for this ball to roll. Being gay is not wrong because it hurts people, it’s wrong because God said so. Period.
If God ever declares the Bible incorrect and that Sodom and Gomorrah (however you spell that) was really Zion, I will be the first in line to embrace all my gay friends and family members. (Not that I don’t embrace them now, I will really embrace them with happiness that they can be gay and righteous.)
And for now when Jesus comes again I will stand with him on the issue…Well, I will try to stand with him, I will probably have to give up the Glee if I ever want that to happen. Not quite ready for that yet.
Last night, the girls were up late finishing homework. I snuck in the other room to watch Glee. I figured out that I have to wait a whole day before it gets posted online and I didn’t want to wait. LG was handling homework duty just fine. Last night was the first night I went to watch Glee on TV. I have been watching Glee on Hulu. Cool site. You can watch any tv show on it with very few commercials. It’s like an online Tivo for the poor. You gotta wait 24 hours though.
I never watch TV. Really. With facebook, a blog, and trying to figure out how to work twitter, whose got the time? Until last night, I had only indulged in my Glee habit after school with the girls. Around here, Glee is like a way liberal updated version of an after school special. We justify it’s viewing because we use it as a teaching tool. Well, last night, Abigail came out to see what I could possibly be doing. She was surprised to find me in front of the TV.
She pined for Glee and whined for her chance to watch it NOW. I told her “later!” She slowly moped back to the kitchen table for homework. She turned to LeGrand and said, “Hey Dad, did you know that Glee comes on TV?”
I love America
What’s not to love?

O.k. I admit it.
I cried when I watched this with my kids on Saturday.
LG made fun of me during Sunday School yesterday
while he explained that just because one has emotion
it doesn’t mean that they are feeling The Spirit.
I would like to make an argument that it could have been
The Spirit
and not just my well of tears that we call mother’s emotion.
Galations 5:22-23
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,
Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.
I was feeling love for Michael Jackson.
I was feeling joy in knowing that back in the day,
all those artists gave to the greater good.
I was feeling peace, thinking back on simpler times we called the 80’s.
I was feeling longsuffering because let’s face it, that diamond studded glove can really make one suffer in pain wondering what’s the point.
I was feeling gentleness as I explained for the 20th time how amazing was the phenomenon of We Are The World.
How can one not feel faith at the lyrics:
“As God has shown us, by turning loaf to bread.”
Especially when the voice singing is Willie Nelson?
And now I am tired and don’t want to think too hard of meekness or temperance.
But, I am sure that I could come up with something.
If I knew that I was going to have to defend my tears
in Sunday School next week.
Consider this a warning for ratting me out LG.
Cheap Entertainment

Or this.



When the girls stopped dancing and startedSpeaking Out
I read a quote on Candace Salima’s blog this morning.
Thomas Jefferson once said, “All tyranny needs to gain a foothold is for people of good conscience to remain silent.”
My girls parked it on the floor behind my buggy with a People magazine. They always do this to pass the time, but this time they couldn’t completely concentrate. They were totally distracted by what was unfolding in front of us, as was I.
While the new checker was completely oblivious, these little girls started loading up their arms with whatever they wanted from the shelves surrounding the check stands. We may not have paid much attention either, but they were knocking down a bunch of stuff while in the process, and I was surprised that their mothers didn’t do anything about it. My girls were most certainly coveting some of the toys, lip glosses, and candy that they were gathering, but never said a word. They know that their allowance would have to be used and I was delighted that the magazine combined with these younger children misbehaving was distracting them from their usual, “Mom do I have enough money to buy this?”
So, on with the story, I was floored because the mother directed the children in Spanish to get a bag from the check stand and to put their stuff in it. The girls each got a bag and did exactly that. What really triggered me is that these sweet little girls kept adding to their loot. They were so excited about all their stuff and kept hugging one another and telling each other gracias and that they loved each other.
I looked to the front of the store to see if I could go and forewarn a worker before their exit, but there was just a teenage kid at the greeting place. I knew it was all up to me.
As the moms finished their shopping. I felt a twinge of guilt. I knew what I was about to do, but I have to say that I almost didn’t because I felt sympathy as they used the last of their food stamps and were counting change to pay for the remaining bill. They had only bought one non-food item, fabric softener. These children were clean and had obviously been cared for physically. They had cute little outfits on and darling sandals.
But, I forged ahead, as it wasn’t their physical needs I was worried about. My motherly instincts came out in full force as anxiety swept over me for the moral character they were being taught. Who teaches a three year old to steal? Especially when you live in a country that basically hands you everything you need, whether you are a citizen or not. And these girls were loaded up with non-essentials. Believe it or not, I was kind of scared. I started the inner dialogue with myself so that I could find the courage to do the right thing.
Right as the second woman was finishing up and the first woman had gathered all the girls around the buggy to leave, I approached. I looked the woman straight in the eye and pointing to the children and their loot bags I said, “They did not pay for those things. They can’t just take them.”
This mom was stunned. She gave me a non appreciative look which silently stated, “Mind your own business.”, but proceeded to take the things from the girls and she placed them on the adjacent check stand. She never quit glaring at me. The one little girl (who I believe belonged to this first woman) went ballistic, throwing a pretty good kiddy tantrum. The other two twins almost seemed relieved.
I guess they don’t want to live among tyranny either.
And, someday maybe my kids will remember me as a mom who wasn’t afraid to stand up for what was right. I hope they won’t just think that I don’t know how to mind my own business because I could have very easily kept my mouth shut.
The moral of the story: don’t check out in front of me if you are the kind of parent who corrupts my world. This mom happens to be one who still believes in the pillars of moral character that they teach at school. (Ironic that I took this photo at the school just one hour before this incident occured, huh?) And I believe in doing what it takes to teach my daughters and yours, and when you fail, you give that right to me.
Taco Bell Song
When I first moved to the South,
I was terrified to order fast food through a window.
They either couldn’t understand me or I couldn’t understand them.
No joke.
I should have tried a folk tune.











