Mental Health

Walk and Walk and Walk

What do you need to feed your pets (or your kids for that matter) to ensure that they will always come home?

When I was in Kindergarten I walked home the 2 miles from school. I thought I could go and see my friend’s house and be back to catch the bus in time. So, when I got back to the school and discovered EVERYONE to be gone, I did what any reasonable 5 year old would do….I walked home. (I may have even been 4 at the time)

And there are advanatages to being part of a large family…it seemed that even though I arrived 3 hours late, no one even noticed. Talk about empowering…I learned at an early age that I could arrive wherever my feet would take me.

Oil and Water

Sometimes I think my husband and I are just TOO different….until I read a joke like this. And then I think, “oh, it could be so much worse.”

While attending a Marriage Seminar dealing with communication, Tom and his wife Grace listened to the instructor, “It is essential that husbands and wives know the things that are important to each other.” He addressed the man, “Can you describe your wife’s favorite flower?” Tom leaned over, touched his wife’s arm gently and whispered, “It’s Pillsbury, isn’t it? The rest of the story gets rather ugly so I’ll stop right here.

Pizza Hut

Would someone really shoot a man to get a free pizza? Nobody’s shooting this pizza man.

As Glenn Reynolds says, “Uh huh. Good thing he didn’t listen (to pizza hut’s policy for pizza deliverers to NOT carry guns) or he might be being carried by six instead of subjected to mealy-mouthed HR flackery from one. “

I am glad this lowly pizza guy is safe, but I have to admit that I am an idealist that wished we lived in a society where NO ONE would be packing a gun. But, if the bad guys are going to have guns, then it is only fair that the good guys are equipped with one too.

Speaking of Pizza Hut, have you tried thier new PizzaMia? If you buy 3 pizzas, you can get a Little Ceasar’s type deal with more flavor…$5 a pizza. The downside, you can’t order the dilectable crazy bread and you have 3 pizzas that you have to eat!

Oh…the laundry!

To start a long post, and hopefully motivate you to keep reading, here is a joke I read recently:

Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, “What setting
do I use on the washing machine?”
“It depends,” I replied. “What does it say
on your shirt?”
He yelled back, “University of Oklahoma.”
And they say
blondes are dumb…

Warning this is a loooooong post…but it just had to be done all together, and if you want to know why, you must read the whole thing.

The laundry that a mother of 3 has to gather, treat, wash, (and sometimes rewash) fold, and put away is NEVER ENDING. My friend Tracy told me that if you ever want a glimpse of eternity, you should just compare it to laundry. Eternity will be different and hopefully a lot more fun than laundry, but the cycles will probably very similar. Clean, put away, wear, dirty…you get it.

I have posted about laundry before…here and here (for the more spiritual side of laundry). It shouldn’t surprise you that the subject has reared its ugly head again. I am a mother. And mothers are made of the stuff they learn while laundering. Some of us glean more lessons than others. That is why I like to take so long to do my laundry…I have the opportunity to learn so much more this way.

A couple of weeks ago, Faye and her mom, Grandma Henderson stopped by. They were on their way to go and help a very pregnant cousin, but some bad weather gave them a “wait out a Southern storm” pit stop at my house. They were greeted by my 10 loads of laundry waiting so patiently on family room floor to be folded. The pile had been growing for at least three days.

Grandma didn’t even try to contain her amazement, as I kept bringing her basket upon basket of clean and wrinkly clothes (the only way we fold laundry around here is wrinkly). I have to give Grandma credit though, she was so cute, as she just kept folding steadily and cheery.

Grandma grew up with 10 siblings in a log cabin in the hills of North Carolina. She also raised 4 children. In response to the hour of the 3 of us folding constantly (except when I stopped to snap photos) Grandma said with all seriousness, “I have never seen this much laundry in my life. It reminds me of when I was growing up and my mom didn’t do laundry between Christmas and Old Christmas, and even then we didn’t have this much.” (Grandma didn’t know what Old Christmas was, but you can read here for a good history lesson…so interesting)Yep, I can always amaze people; even when they are aged and think that they have experienced everything, they really just haven’t spent enough time with ME!

Well, I have to say that I was kind of embarrassed, and partially relieved…luckily, there was no lingerie in the pile. Faye also did my dishes; it was lucky for her that they had only been piling up since that morning. (did you know that I have NO dishwasher? – married for ten years and I have only had a dishwasher for a total of 10 months – and THAT is something to brag about – my hands are even still soft at times)

It was so nice of Faye and Grandma, especially considering they were only here a total of 2 hours. What can I say though, LG is a product of some of the best women in the world? I hollered out as they were leaving, “Any time you want to come and do my laundry or my dishes, just stop on by.”

It can probably go unsaid, but laundry is always something that I have NOT mastered. What can I do to make it less torturous…I have no answers…yet.

So, when I was out with some girls the other night, we sat and talked and talked. We had so much fun, even if The Olive Garden fed us “puke dip”(affectionately named by the one and only Cally) OG’s new Smoked Mozzarella Fonduta Dip is NOT good. That was an understatement..it was nasty (what a bummer) And, yes, I took a picture of it. (Keep reading this does have to do with laundry)

If you want to read from the girls I was with, go to Cally, Lori, and Mandy. Sorry, Rachel doesn’t have a blog (what is she thinking?) I had no idea that Cally and I shared an affinity for Black Tie Mousse Cake….YUMMY! But they changed the crust from Oreos to cake. I hope they go back, it used to be so much better; I was so disappointed.

Come to think of it, I was disappointed with the only two things I ordered that night, between the girls and the bread sticks, I didn’t even notice.

Anyhow, back to the laundry. Throughout the night, I was laughing so hard because it was as if we couldn’t start ONE sentence without the word blog in it. Here are examples of starter sentences. “On my blog”, “Oh your blog”, “Did you read that blog”, “That is some great blog material” or the best being “I have got to blog about that”.

On the way home, we were discussing how pathetically addicted we all are at the moment…and it only makes it worse that we feed off of each other.

To change the subject, I proposed the question, “Can anyone help me with my laundry dilemma?”

We had a great lengthy discussion of many great ideas that I am too lazy to try and have already ruled out. The discussion really led to my confession of forgetting to stay on top of my laundry because of my blog. The girls and I all decided that they should send me random “do your laundry” reminders in the my blog’s comments from time to time. This way I couldn’t conveniently forget. You can imagine my delight, when a week later, Cally posted this. (She has a way with surprise…she waited just long enough for me to forget the conversation…the Cruze’s are so good with the element of surprise)

This is what the boys did while we went out. ..

Maybe I should have taken over my laundry for them..surely we would have got home before 2 am if they were folding instead of warring….Man, I can’t remember the last time I stayed up until 2 when blogging wasn’t involved.

Bowling for a Break

I recently posted about LG’s desire to join a bowling league to escape the female hormones that are rampant at our house.

So, over Spring Break, we did the next best thing. We went bowling with all the female hormones in tow. Lucky for LG, we joined some of our friends from the testosterone family.
I have to say Matt is one fierce competitor when it comes to who has the most testosterone, and I am only saying that to get him to read my blog.
Here are some pictures in the form of how to have a successful time when bowling with children.
Tip #1: Kick back and try to enjoy the constant motion of the children. Try not to worry about the children throwing the bowling etiquette out the window. Hope that you don’t get people from the redneck bowling league on the lane next to you. (Man, I knew I should have taken their picture)

I know this is a picture of Rita’s backside, but you can’t really see it, and I wanted you to all see her knocking down ONE pin…and we all know that is the hardest thing to do when bowling. Unfortunately, the picture is too small here and you can’t see her blue ball knocking down the pin either.

But, Tip #2: Aim the best you can, and let the bumpers take care of the rest. And try not to worry about anyone taking a picture of your backside.

Tip #3: Demonstrated by Sophia. Dry your hands on the hand blower as often as possible. This seemed to be more fun for the kids than the actual bowling. That blower was never idle throughout the night.

Tip #4: Keep your eye on the ball.

Tip #5:

Try not to obsess about the score.

Tip #6: Say Cheese when your moms get out the cameras, and you will be duly rewarded.

Tip #7: Dig in, because when you said cheese,
your mothers responded with the Nachos. And everybody loves Nachos: big and small.

Tip #8: Take a nap before the final frame.
And the final tip of the night:
Go bowling on the night that games only cost $1.
No matter what goes wrong, everyone will be happy, even the dad’s leave happy.
$20 for our family of 5, and you know he couldn’t have bowled in a league that cheap.
And who wants to bowl with all the rednecks anyways?
They would never jump up and down for you when you get a strike.
And, they would have most definitely threw you out when you missed that split, instead of climbing up into your lap for a hug.
(not that you would want a hug from them anyway, and you certainly wouldn’t want them climbing in your lap)