Book Reviews

Baby, You’re A Firebolt

If you love Harry Potter and funny videos.

This is a must see by BYU divine comedy.

It’s not quite as good as Harry and the Deathly Hollows Part II,

but it may give you just as many laughs.

Last night LG and I went to

Gracious Rain’s Premiere Party.

I was the evil witch and

he was the boring guy

who didn’t want to dress up.

“Baby, you’re still a firebolt,”

for indulging my lunacy last night.

As I finished getting dressed,

Caroline would have nothing to do with me

and LG turned to Sophia

and said,

“Oh man,

I am going to be so embarrassed.”

Love you too babe.

Later he tried to make up for it

by tweeting that I was the hottest witch in the room,

but it didn’t quite do it for me.

Because I literally was the hottest witch in the room.

I was wearing 4 layers.

Now for my review.
I know you’ve all been busting at the seems for it.

(If you’ve been living in a Hogwarts History book
and don’t know who is going to die in the movie,
you may want to read this
after your viewing)

First of all,
when Fred dies,
a piece of this funny girl died too.

Oh, you didn’t know that Fred died.
So sorry.
You have no right to watch the movies
if you haven’t read the book.
A part of this girl died
when Fred died in the book,
and when he died in the movie,
I just had a short revisit
to the moment I read about
this terrible misfortune
years ago
and sat up and cried all night.

Then when they show Remus and Tonks dead,
all I could think to myself was
shouldn’t Tonks hair be a brighter color
so that all the fools that didn’t read the books
would know that was her?

Then when Harry died,
I was like
“Is he really dead?”
No I wasn’t
because I read the book
and
I knew he wasn’t really dead,
but I still cried.

And then when Harry finally
defeated that horrible Voldermort
why was I the only one in the theatre
who cheered?
Why?
Why?
My husband even shooshed me.
C’mon people.
Ding Dong the dude is dead.

I didn’t cry when Voldemort died.
In the book or the movie.
Good riddance.
The only regret I had
was that the poor monster
never knew love.
But, isn’t that what JK Rowling
was trying to tell us all along?

Then
19 years later:
life went on,
in a profound way:
Harry had
a fatherly chat
with his nervous son,
Albus Severus Potter.
(The name was a trend on twitter
all night long)
“Son, the sorting hat,
takes your vote into account.”
Harry should know all about that.

At this point,
I had an epiphany:
love is life.
life is love.
Why not love life?
Even if it’s just the ordinary?

Or even if it’s magical
and fictional
it’s still worthy of our deep devotion,
isn’t it?

I think they made Ginny a little pudgier
which made me happy
because she’s a mom
and she’s still beautiful
with a few extra pounds.
And I am sorry to the actress who played Ginny
if they didn’t really make you
look chubbier
but I just thought that they did.
Ron was chubbier too.
It’s in the Weasley genes.
Apparently,
the Potter and Granger genes
are skinny to the end.

You know,
I dressed up like Bellatrix
to show outwardly
the love I have inwardly
for the magic we call Potter.

And people may have disagreed
with my choice of the dark side,
but without the dark side,
there would have been
no story in the first place.
Another good
and true
life lesson.

Favorite parts of the movie:
(Here are the spoilers
in no particular order)

Getting out of Gringots on the dragon.
Ron and Hermione kiss. (finally)
Ginny saying “I know” to Harry.
Professor McGonagall saying
“I always wanted to use that spell.”
Dumbledore talking about
not pitying the dead.
Harry viewing Snape’s memories
and finally understanding Snape’s actions.
Snape saying
“You have your mother’s eyes.”
Harry when he comes back to life
and jumps out of Hagrid’s arms.
Neville.
Everything about Neville.
From when he brings Harry into the castle,
to slaying Nagini,
and sitting by Luna awkwardly at the end.
Mrs. Weasley hollaring at Bellatrix and defeating her.
When Hermione calls Ron brilliant
and kind of shakes her head in surprise.
Professor McGonagall giving
the boys permission to blow up the bridge
and them being uncertain about whether or not
she is serious.
Harry conversing with his momma.

And, just thinking about all this stuff
is making me cry again.
All I can do is
scream out:
FFFFRRRRRREEEEEEEEDD
Why did she have to kill Fred?

What was your favorite part of the movie
or the book?

And please spare me your
whining about what was different
between the two
because I really don’t pay that much attention.

Edward Diggory and the House of Fashion.

Pinterest is pretty cool.

My boards are still under construction

but there are plenty more to enjoy.

Pinterest is where you find funny things like this:

Harry Potter kicks Edward’s trash any given day.

I am so sad that there won’t be any more movies.

Oh, and don’t try to call me this morning

to hear my review,

I will be sleeping until noon.

Thanks to Launi

for the awesome

premier party with tons of cool give aways.

Pictures to follow.

(I totally scheduled this post way ahead of time,

so I am keeping my fingers crossed that

nothing catastrophic happens

that will keep me from

enjoying the party)

The Magic We Call Harry Potter

Recently, when pressed on the issue,
I decided that
magic
is my favorite word.

Magic.
It describes how I feel about the love I share with my husband.
It perfectly defines anything that is too cool to be described.
It is the noun that says how I feel about my kids.
Magic.
Is it one of those cool words
that is not only a noun,
but a verb too!

I magic’d on over to her house in two seconds flat.
While playing basketball, he magic’d around the other player, all the way to the hoop

Months ago, two of my magical children
decided that JK Rowling
missed a few vital spells
when she wrote her masterpiece Harry Potter.
How she missed these in all seven books of her series I do not know.
But without further delay,
it is time for all the spells to be known.

And because I am so looking forward
to my upcoming Harry Potter extravaganza
I find it a perfect time to share:

Freeze a Thing
Polka Dot A Kus
Dogga Loc Us
Go Away Kus
Go To Sleep Us
Throw Up Ist
Zip Lips (You know with this mom, they need this one every day)
Water Cause
Fire Cause

Doggalocus is my favorite.
Here is one of my kids’ favorite YouTube videos of all time:

Just now, while watching the video
Me to Abigail:
Why do you think Dumbledore is naked?
Abigail: (laughing)
I don’t know, because he is gay.

Yes, we are all about the magic around here.
We know every bit of Harry Potter trivia known to mankind.
And, we even make up our own.

Comebackacus.
Readalottamore.
Lovethisbloga.

What’s your best attempt at a vital spell?
I was thinking
laundrydonanow.

Oh, and I need your opinion?
Should LG and I dress up like

Arthur and Molly Weasley?

or
Vernon and Petunia Dursley?

Or maybe
LG could be Vernon
and I could Molly.
Oh the scandal, we would be at the party.

Potter and Johnson

I need to blog. I need to dig into some photos on my hard drive and share some fun stuff we’ve done.
I need to write some funny stuff.

But what am I doing?

Watching this of course:

Pottermore has my loyalty.

Even if that darn JK refuses to write another book!

I’ve also been looking for lost classmates for my 20 year high school reunion.

That is so exciting. It also makes me feel very old. It’s also puzzling a bit.
Why can’t anyone find Ted Johnson?

He has his own wikipedia page and the only way I could think to find him was to send his booking agent a note. I hope he will pass it along. It wouldn’t be the same without Ted. He’s the one that broke the news to me that I won at my election for Sophomore class president. I should have kissed him like this. You can get away with things like that in the moment of excitement. And out of all the boys I kissed in high school I really did my bragging rights a great disservice by not kissing the future SuperBowl champ. 4 superbowls people.

I am now really tempted to write nasty things about the Mormon boy who had the gall to call me a jack mormon in my yearbook who has repeatedly ignored my facebook friend requests. Funny thing is, he was a football player too. But never made it past college ball. And he was a kicker…not quite the same as sweet and hunky Ted the linebacker. And to think my friends thought he would be a match made in heaven for me when he moved in our Senior year. Blah on you Mr man who shall not be named Voldemort, but all of our classmates know who I am talking about. I dare you to show up at our reunion. Double dog dare. And Ted better be there to back me up. Oh forget Ted, I’ve got my husband to back me. And even though LG wouldn’t hurt a fly, he can outsmart anyone (o.k. most anyone) there I am sure. And after 20 years we better be past fist fighting.

So, I am now off to tumbling class. And then I will be slave driving all afternoon. These kids have got to do some chores! Sometimes I wish that the wizarding world was real. Accio clean laundry, please. Coming soon: the funny spells my kids invented.

I know you are dying for them now, but you are going to have to wait because I have to go and this post has been too long.

My girls

My girls all know that they revealed Katniss because I e-mailed them

as soon as I discovered the magazine cover.

About a year ago I decided that I finally had enough friends to fulfill a lifelong dream of starting a book-club.

Here is a photo of my last chance to attend back in March. I guess the ladies will be carrying on the tradition without me. Which makes me totally ecstatic and extremely depressed. Tonight I may have to go out with LG dressed up like a woman. The thought is cracking me up.

While living in Tennessee, one of my greatest life lessons was how important relationships are and how we need to allow others into our lives. The bi-monthly meetings I had with these women was a manifestation to me of God’s love and support. These women are smart. They are fun and they are some of God’s greatest creations. They offered me complete acceptance and love and I miss them somethin awful. I love them all dearly, even the ones missing from the photo, and especially that one in the middle of the photo that got her head cut in two.

The good news is that moving so far away hasn’t taken any satisfaction away from reading. I can still enjoy many many books. It’s just that whenever I get done reading a really good one, I have this overwhelming urge for a Panera Apple chip salad and some conversation. I think I will be 85 years old and reminiscent of the good old days with my ladies.

Not only have I made memories with these ladies that I can’t shake, they have shaped my universe. I can’t think of any better ladies to do my shaping. The other day I was at the bookstore and I found myself advising an unsure buyer that her friend would love reading The Help and I thought of the evening we all spent at Valerie’s house. LG came home from work a while back and told me that actors had been cast for the movie The Hunger Games and I thought of the discussion about who like me imagined Peeta chunkier. I saw the The Book Thief on the shelf at the library and thought of Rachel and that daunting voice of death.

The moral of the story: make friends. And read together. It’s bonding. For life. And so enlightening.

Book Review – Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society

Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society by Mary Ann Shaffer

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

What do you get when you add together a deep and searching writer with a bunch of quirky lovers of literature confined to an island? A wonderful love story. Not just a love story between two people, but between many many people. Not in a creepy polygamous kind of way, but in a love conquers all riveting story.

I LOVED this book. I listened to it while traveling across the country with three children a cat and a dog. (I almost accidently wrote a cat and a god. I always mix up my g and d fingers) But find it a funny slip because I think God was with me testifying of the truthfulness of the principle of love throughout the book. I think I would have loved the book more if I could have actually read it from paper, as the story was told by many letters written and received among lots of lovely characters. But, just so you know how fun and interesting these letters were, know that I wore a pair of headphones in my car so that I could drown out the children and pets and give complete focus.

I am so glad I persevered. Before the Guernsey island characters were introduced the book was a bore. Really, is there any way to lose for an author who places her story in the aftermath of World War II? Who doesn’t love reading about this fascinating time frame? I had personally never thought about how the war effected a little English Isle. To be honest, even though I will look totally ignorant, I didn’t even know the island existed before reading this fiction. I am just assuming the island is really there. Correct me if I am wrong.

The characters were to die for. An orphaned girl whose mother was sent to be imprisoned for helping out a suffering soldier. A boy who was sent off to the mainland to survive the war. Both children were raised by a literary society. A very loving literary society. I couldn’t help but think of my book club girls. The beauty of this literary society was the variety of personalities. There was one woman who was a witch and had a pet parrot. A man who was a simple farmer. A typical motherly loving sort. Then there was the love interest. He’s dreamy.

Add into the story a homosexual man. A survivor of the concentration camps. A rich American. A best friend (who happens to be the sister of the homosexual.) An arrogant and snotty and holier than thou (who is bound to make anyone religious person second think they’re close mindedness). And wha-la. It’s a story you won’t want to put down. Fascinating and personally rewarding. Entertaining. And most of all beautiful. It will make you want to be a hero or a heroine. It will make the most miserable of people want to be a Saint. More than anything, this great work of fiction is a testament to the power of people when they open their minds and love one another.

View all my reviews

Book Review: Have A Little Faith

Have a Little Faith: The Story of a Last Request by Mitch Albom

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

I have always loved the Jews. Anna Elovitz is one of the most wonderful people I know and she has been a wonderful friend since I was just a baby in High School. Her brother Adam took me on my first date. I was wearing the most ridiculous dress. Sorry Adam. I had no taste. What can I say? He was most gracious though. I am so relieved that those photos are all in someone’s attic about now. I am not even going to entertain the thought of sharing it. The Elovitz family is one of the best families I know.

Another book that I absolutely love was written by a Jew: Man’s Search for Meaning. Viktor Frankl was a very wise man. There is also another book about a Jew that I love. The Holy Bible: The New Testament.

Sorry, I wanted to give you some background of my knowledge of the Jewish faith. It’s limited. Very limited. I went to a Passover Feast once. I have seen menorahs in windows and I remember Anna having to do something on Friday nights sometimes because her Sabbath was from when the sun went down on Friday until the sun went down on Saturday.

This book, Have A Little Faith, was written by a Jew. It serves two purposes. It is first a wonderful testament to the power of faith. Secondly, it is a remarkable tribute and comparison between a beloved Jewish rabbi and a non Orthodox Christian pastor. Each have great faith. Each were completely inspiring.

I highly recommend this book to people of all faiths everywhere. I especially recommend this book to people without faith. I dog-eared half of the book, but let me give you just a few of my favorite parts:

The Talmudic translation of the account of the parting of the red sea. Mitch Albom remembered a religious school lesson fondly. God said to the angels who were celebrating the destruction of the Egyptians: “Stop celebrating. For these were my children, too.” Wow. God does love all his children, doesn’t He?

Rabbi Albert Lewis recounted the experience he had of trying to comfort a faithless physician who could not make his only belief in science save his sick brother. He had no one to blame but himself when people of faith can always blame God. Albert Lewis: “It is far more comforting to think God listened and said no than to think nobody’s out there.”

A conversation between a rabbi and his parishioner:
“So have we solved the secret of happiness?
I believe so.
Are you going to tell me?
Yes, Ready?
Ready.
Be satisfied.
That’s it?
Be grateful.
That’s it?
For what you have. For the love you receive. And what God has given you.
That’s it?
That’s it.”

I could go on and on, but I don’t want to ruin all the stories. They are each so inspiring. Collectively they are a bit overwhelming. In a good way. In a God way.

This is a quick read. I started one night at 11 p.m. and stayed up until 3 a.m. reading. I am slow reader. I never stay up that late. I couldn’t put the book down. It had the perfect mixture of laughing and crying and chillbumps.

View all my reviews

The Public Library

One of our first stops here in our new home was the Public Library.

for new library cards.

Of course.

The library is a poor man’s friend. It is the smart man’s friend and it’s my sanity.

I love public libraries.

And I love our new library.

It’s humongous!

There is a whole basement of movies, books on tape and music.

There is also a whole wing of children’s book with a whole upstairs of more advanced readers for middle school age.

Just thought you might like some of the photos of the view from the front of the library.

This is where you go if you don’t turn your books back in time.
He he

And look, we have blossoms here almost as pretty as in Tennessee.

We live in a wonderful place where we not only have beautiful mountains but also a lot of people who think literacy is important.

We are really looking forward to the world-famous Timpanogas StoryTelling Festival.

Dr. Seuss Day

As many of you know, March 2nd is officially Dr. Seuss Day. Our school decided to celebrate a little bit later. Today the kids had the option to dress up like a Seuss character.

I will be the first to admit that I was so happy when they confided in me that they didn’t want to dress up.

“It’s not worth it. It’s too much work”, they said.

I was happy counting my fortune and then changed gears and wondered if it wasn’t too late to convince them to participate. I started to worry if I was teaching my kids to be lackadaisical. All sorts of things started flying through my mind: chore charts, money lessons, bribing techniques, desperate measures, and many other memories associated with teaching the kids to work.

I quickly snapped out of it. Should it really be a life crisis that my kids don’t want to do an optional dress up for school? It’s not like they’ve never dressed up before.

I quickly googled the master himself to see if any of his writings would back me up:

“Be who you are and say what you feel,
because those who mind don’t matter
and those who matter don’t mind.”

I don’t care if the kids dress up and I am pretty sure that the people at school who may think it matters, really won’t mind if my kids don’t participate.

And just that fast I felt free.
It didn’t require going here or there.
Or eating green eggs or ham.
Or counting fish.
Or dressing up a cat in a hat.

It just required this mom to let go of her own issues to give her kids some space to underachieve.

If you want to read something funnier about Dr. Seuss that is slightly inappropriate for children (wink wink) go here. You will laugh.