Inspiring

True Joy
Evan and Leah Wampler are friends of ours in Kingsport, TN.
They had little baby Liam a while back.
He weighed just a pound and has been confined to the NICU
for many long weeks
as he grows strong enough to meet the outside world.
Our prayers have been mighty on behalf of Liam
and we have been so pleased that
by the grace of God he has grown and developed.
The wonderful world of facebook 
has kept us updated every step of the way.

Leah posted this picture the other day.
It had the caption
Evan feeding Liam with a bottle for the first time.

It struck me profoundly.
What a beautiful beautiful moment.
How many times have I fed my four children
and never gave it a moment’s notice?
This photo so perfectly depicts 
one of the way God works in our mortal journey.
It’s a hard lesson to swallow
yet so necessary:
God lets us suffer
so that we can truly enjoy the non-suffering.
If we didn’t know the pain,
we couldn’t enjoy the joy.
I am so grateful for all the hard times I have endured
because those hard times
make my normal and even somewhat insignificant life
seem like such a miracle every day.
Thank you God
for my trials
and for Liam.

Boundaries
Abigail is gonna kill me for sharing this photo.
I’d like to entitle it
For The Love of Bacon.
This girl can actually out-eat her mom
when it comes the Western Bacon Cheeseburgers.
She also happened to get Straight A’s last term.
It was a big deal
because we didn’t require it of her 
or offer any rewards or anything.
She just decided she could apply herself better
and she did.
We were so proud.
But, this post isn’t about that.
I just wanted to explain why I bought 
her a Western  Bacon Cheeseburger.
We were celebrating

her awesomeness.
She makes us so proud
in so many ways.
I had a profound experience yesterday
and while I was just showering it dawned on me
that I was able to apply the lessons I have learned
about boundaries.
It also donned on me that boundaries
are really just agency.
God has taught us all about agency.
I thought about how so many people don’t get how 
to utilize the principle of agency in their lives.
They let people intrude on their agency
and they intrude on others’ agency without knowing it.
Yesterday I dropped Abigail off at a Valentine’s Party.
It was at the home of a boy that I don’t know at all.
When I dropped her off, 
I walked her in and met some of the kids.
I was especially interested in the host.
He explained that their chaperon 
for the night was his 25 year old brother.
I immediately cringed and questioned,
“Is he a good 25 year old brother or 
is he the kind that is going to buy you beer as soon as I turn my back?”
The kid’s reaction was very telling.
He looked shocked and said, “No way, he’s not that kind.”
I reminded Abigail to have fun.
I silently checked to make sure I had covered 
all the lecture bases on the way over.
Don’t go anywhere alone. Check.
If there is anything inappropriate 
and I find out later that you didn’t call 
with the key emergency word 
which means to come and get you now 
then you will not be trusted 
to go to other parties in the future.
Check.
You do remember the emergency word?
You do remember what things are inappropriate?
Yes mom. I know.
But I still had an uneasy feeling.
I sat out in the car and texted Abigail and told her how I felt.
I asked her if she would go in the bathroom 
and pray about whether or not I should leave her there.
She texted back and said “I am staying.”
I then went to the neighbor across the street 
that showed signs of a bunch of kids living there 
and questioned them if they thought I could trust this boy and his brother.
They assured me that they were “good people.”
I prayed and felt o.k. and then I called LG and he said he felt alright.
So I drove home.
Later in the evening, when we got the low down from Abigail 
about the party I asked her,
“Did you really go in the bathroom and pray?”
She surprised me and said, 
“Yes I did mom, and I felt o.k. about staying.”
I was floored. Was she just telling me what I wanted to hear?
I do believe she was telling me the truth.
I thought about that this morning.
I thought about how I didn’t intrude on my daughter’s agency.
I thought about how I acted like God.
I was a concerned parent, I communicated those concerns,
but then I laid the decision making where it belonged:
in my daughter’s lap.
I thought about how I was proud 
that I had taught her how to pray 
and listen for the still small voice to communicate with her.
LG and I have taught her to go to the ultimate source of wisdom:
not him and I, but to our loving and all-knowing God.
I then thought of all my friends who control their kids.
Who don’t let them utilize agency.
Who don’t allow them to grow and learn.
Which in turn keeps them from seeking out God in their lives.
And also in turn makes them want to rebel against being controlled.
I thought even deeper about why God gives us agency.
He wants us to learn to be like Him.
He doesn’t want to control us.
Because He knows that would make us resentful.
He has a perfect knowledge of boundaries,
and he doesn’t intrude on our boundaries.
And he doesn’t let us intrude on His.
Agency was awesome last night.
I am sure there will be days when my kids will choose wrong,
and I will dislike agency,
but I will come back to this post
and remember this incident
and know that agency is vital
and that agency is awesome
because it’s only the agency
that we can see our kids grow up
and make their own great decisions.
Don’t control people.
Do this.
“Teach them correct principles and let them govern themselves.”

Memorizing Scripture
After the last general conference
one of the things
we decided to work on as a family
is memorizing scripture.
Richard G Scott gave a great address
on scriptures being our friends.
It got me thinking about how many times
God has spoken to me through a verse
of scripture running through my head.
I thought I better work harder at giving scriptures
to the girls so that in their time of need
God will be able to speak to them through
the scriptures that are stored in their brain.
We started with my favorite scripture.
This verse has been there with me
through a whole lot of hard stuff.
Proverbs 3:5-6
We all took a turn writing a line.
Caroline even got a turn.
As we all cited the scripture together
for the first time
Caroline was quick to correct us that
after path
we are all to say
scribble scribble scribble
circle.
How dare we leave out her part?
How many of you bet
that someday in the near future
God will speak to my girls
by letting them hear
the words
scribble scribble scribble circle
in their minds and hearts
when they need it the most?
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The Miracles of Life

I have tried to capture
a good photo of the moon
for as long as I can remember.

I have never had a real nice camera
and keeping it steady enough
to get a focused photo
is really tricky at night.

On Halloween,
I finally got my shot.
I looked and looked for
an inspiring quote to go with it
but I couldn’t find what I was looking for.

So I made my own.

I loved the story that I read by
Thomas S. Monson.
He is an inspired man of God
and his address titled
Finding Joy in the Journey
from 2008
is something that will get you
looking at your life
from a whole new perspective.

Many years ago I was touched by the story of Borghild Dahl. She was born in Minnesota in 1890 of Norwegian parents and from her early years suffered severely impaired vision. She had a tremendous desire to participate in everyday life despite her handicap and, through sheer determination, succeeded in nearly everything she undertook. Against the advice of educators, who felt her handicap was too great, she attended college, receiving her bachelor of arts degree from the University of Minnesota. She later studied at Columbia University and the University of Oslo. She eventually became the principal of eight schools in western Minnesota and North Dakota.
She wrote the following in one of the 17 books she authored: “I had only one eye, and it was so covered with dense scars that I had to do all my seeing through one small opening in the left of the eye. I could see a book only by holding it up close to my face and by straining my one eye as hard as I could to the left.”
Miraculously, in 1943—when she was over 50 years old—a revolutionary procedure was developed which finally restored to her much of the sight she had been without for so long. A new and exciting world opened up before her. She took great pleasure in the small things most of us take for granted, such as watching a bird in flight, noticing the light reflected in the bubbles of her dishwater, or observing the phases of the moon each night. She closed one of her books with these words: “Dear … Father in heaven, I thank Thee. I thank Thee.”
Borghild Dahl, both before and after her sight was restored, was filled with gratitude for her blessings.

We have so much for which to be grateful.
I know a God of miracles.
And I love Him with all my heart.
Dear Father in Heaven,
I thank thee also.
For all the miracles in my life.

The Uinta’s
There is no better day than Sunday
to post a bunch of photos
of my family
and God’s great earth.
I love them both.
Thank you God
for my amazing life.
Feel free to join us on our drive
from last weekend.
It’s pictures like the one above
that make me want to
oblige the girls
when they tell us we need to have another baby.
How bout it honey?
Rock on rock.
Or as Caroline says it
big rock, little rock.
I love girls with pockets.
I love pockets with souvenirs.
I love free souvenirs.
I can hear your sigh.
I wish you could have come with us too.
Just imagine what I could do
with a camera that costs more than $100.
My birthday is coming up LG.
(hint hint)
Yeah right.
We all know he ain’t spending more
than $100 on me for my birthday.
A girl can dream though.
We love you Uinta Mountains.
Especially in the Fall.
Thanks again to a God
who is the ultimate artist.
You take our breathe away.
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Beautiful Heartbreak

I’ve experienced heartbreak.
More than one.
I remember vividly a day years ago when my friend Lindsey
walked in my front door
to find me completely debilitated,
inconsolable, defeated, and heartbroken.
I was on my couch crying uncontrollobly
while my three small children
were running around neglected.
When I told Lindsey what was going on
she cried too.

Earlier in the day, I had tried to go to the library
to escape the pain,
my toddler was a monster,
surely responding to her mom’s emotional state.
A mean old man confronted me
and told me I was a horrible mother.
Of course, that day I was a horrible mother.
It was all I could do not to shoot myself in the head.

He didn’t see all the other days.
The good days.
The days before the crippling pain.
But the other mom did.
She was usually by my side for weekly storytime.
She rushed out to my car and prayed for me
while I bawled some more at the wheel of my car.

You may think I am just some dramafied attention mongrel,
but you will never know.
The heartbreak is one I have shared with very few.
But it was awful. It is something I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy.

I have worked for years to overcome that pain.
The only thing that finally gave me solace
was turning it over to the Lord.
Over and over again.
I have become
an expert at handing it over.
So much so
that I have become a new person.
A better person.
A stronger person.
A happier person.
A more peaceful person.
And a person who seeks the Lord.

I have experienced a beautiful heartbreak.
More than one actually.
I have experienced a repeated heartbreak
until I gave it to my Lord
so many times that it
became beautiful.
Just because I shared it.
And He turned it into beauty.

So, I loved this song this morning.
Even if Hilary Weeks
stole it from this life-changing blog post.

I hope we can all be Lindsey’s
or praying moms,
but really sometimes we may
be moms who neglect our kids
or ornery old men who are mean and critical.
And hopefully other people will just remember
that we might be at the bottom,
or trying to hike our way out of the
beautiful heartbreak.

But even though I don’t have a video made about me
or I am not an inspirational speaker
or a famous blogger,
I can testify
with all the honesty of my heart
that God will bring us through
our worst pain.
He may even take us through it on purpose
so that we can have a new and beautiful vista
when we reach the top
where we have learned to
stay right by His side.

P.S. Help DeAnne not to experience the heartbreak of coming so close to first place as HeroMom of the year and not winning. Please go vote now. If you get someone else to vote, besides you, leave me a message and tell me who you got to vote and I will add you into a real special post coming up very soon.

Lyrics with Lessons

I recently really enjoyed this post by Cameron Smithson. Cameron used a great song to prove his point that if you want to be loved, you need to give love. You can love without being loved, but it sure does work better when it goes both ways.

Cameron was a Mormon missionary in Knoxville when we lived there and he came from my parts of California, so of course we fed him often. I’ve loved getting to know Elder Smithson as a person instead of just a missionary through his facebook and blog.

If you happen to cross paths with a Mormon missionary, I encourage you to ask them about their love for the Savior Jesus Christ. It may surprise you how close 19 year old kids can be to the Master himself.

In the LDS culture, we often play the do you know game. Well guess what I recently discovered about Cameron? His uncle is the wave at the bus guy I told you about a while back. Cameron’s aunt and mom left me some sweet comments after making the connection on facebook. Thanks guys.

When I told LG about Cameron’s kin all he said was, “Why is it no surprise that Smithson is related?” That was said in the highest complimentary way, of course. What cool people!!! It’s the California connection.

Anyhow, Cameron got me thinking about, how, I, like him, love songs with good lessons.

Lately this has been one of my fav’s.

I would like to dedicate this song to my husband
who is learning the other important life lesson about love.
You don’t have to earn love.
You don’t even have to be perfect to be loved.
In fact I think love is
almost received to a greater depth
when people are at their worst
because that’s when they need it the most.

LG, you are perfect to me.
Even at your worst.

Another one of my favorite lyrics is:

All you need is love.

I was really bummed yesterday
when President Monson
alluded to the fact
that it isn’t true
when talking about the
60’s hippy movement.
Bummer.

We love music around here.
Remember how I used Sarah McLaughlin’s lyrics
to make these adorable framed photographs in my dining room?

What are your favorite lyrics with lessons?

I love you Father.

I forget a lot.

I also remember a lot.

September 11, 2001 is a date nobody in America forgets. I was up all night with a sick baby. I turned on the T.V. only to find news coverage of a burning building. I quickly turned it off not wanting to focus on anything of importance. I went back to bed. When I woke up a little more rested and with a clear mind it then registered. My world had changed.

However I had not. I got down on my knees and prayed, but the intensity with which I prayed was no different than the day before. The subject matter was just a lot different. I didn’t need a tragedy to remember my God. I remember him every day.

I am grateful every day for all those who sacrifice for my freedom of worship.

Take some time.
Tell your Father that you love him.
Try to remember his love for you.

Here is a great message for today and always.

Waiting
I am waiting on a phone call
that will change my life.
I don’t know what it will be like to be a working mom
and I am nervous about it,
but I am also assured from mighty prayer
that God is watching over me
and will strengthen me.
I was just thinking about how much I hate waiting.
I’ve never been too good at waiting.
Give me my future NOW dangit.
Don’t make me wait.
And then instead of worrying about
whether or not the phone call is going to come,
I giggled some with Caroline,
and made her favorite treat.
A bottle of milk.
Yes, she is two and still gets a bottle.
Then I sat down to read some scripture online.
I need to do my dailies.
And what pops up?
LG’s pandora radio.
I guess he made it happen automatically.
And waiting became an all new experience,
as I listened intently to LG’s favorites.
I wondered how I can sing more like
Sarah McLachlan or Natalie Merchant.
And a broad smile conquers all
when I hear
Somewhere Over the Rainbow.
It is such a beautiful song.
And it played three times
while I was getting my root canal.
I imagined I was on the beach,
and made sure the dentist knew
that my husband hates that glitch in pandora.
Sometimes it plays the same songs over and over again.
The older I get, the better I get at waiting.
In fact, if you think about it,
all of the good things in my life
have happened while I was waiting on what’s next.
Waiting is the best place to be.

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