Did you know that there
are college degrees
in family science?
I never got it when I was younger.
Why would anyone
go to all that school
just to learn how to
be married and have a family?
Can’t anyone do that?
Doesn’t everyone do that?
I felt that those who majored
in family studies
were just doing so
because they wanted
an easy Bachelor’s Degree.
Or they were looking
to build a resume
for their future spouse.
“Look at me,
I want to
spend eternity
in your kitchen.”
The older I get,
and the more I attend
marriage counseling,
I am grateful for
the other suckers who
went through all the work
to help me to figure
out the complicated
parts that I never
understood back then.
And honestly: still don’t.
just like everyone else,
I get it right,
without any studying at all.
Sometimes I get it right
out of sure dedication
and practice.
In the kitchen,
I need no therapy.
I am the boss.
In one small area
I’ve got the momming down
to a science.
I’m a PHDmf.
People Hone Down
(my food)
Here is a photo
for evidence.
Tuesday afternoon
this is what my kitchen counter looked like
right before I headed
out to my real job.
(ha ha – we all know
momming is my real job)
white chicken chili, homemade bread,
and after-school cookies
Let me brag for a moment.
Just the other day,
while we were on our way to soccer
Abigail received a text
from a charming young man
with whom we attend church.
We had taken his family
some cookies the day before.
He said,
and I quote,
“I would marry you
just so I could get your mom
in the deal.”
Fist pumps were had
all around.
This little exchange
made my day.
Add to the fact
that Abigail’s boy buddy
at school
(who has learned to cook
out of sheer desperation
because his mom doesn’t)
calls me
“the regular Rachel Ray.”
The neighborhood
adolescents’ each have
their own
favorites of mine
whether it be
pumpkin bread,
cinnamon rolls,
chocolate chip cookies,
cake pops,
homemade bread,
or pizza.
Yeah I screw up
in the momming
But today I just want to take
 a moment to scream from my laptop:
“Guess what?
When it comes to
all it takes
is some skill in the kitchen!”
Momming comes naturally.
It comes best
while wearing an apron.
You can’t learn it at college.
The reason any food is good
is because
the cooking of it has been
practices and practiced
and mixed,
and spooned,
and baked,
with LOVE
til it reaches
the status of
God had it all figured out.
He gave us plenty of time
to get it right while they are young
and didn’t know any different.
By the time
they just want to hang out with their friends
the moms who have put
in the most
They can’t resist bringing
their friends home
for some down home food.
They don’t know it
but they are all getting
some good old momming
all of the time.
Every bite
includes a
subliminal message
“drugs are bad”
“believe in yourself”
“I love you”
“I’m always here for you”
I might still have a bunch
of stuff to figure out,
but when I think of
my success in the kitchen,
I know
that even
without a college degree
I’m doing pretty good.
It’s not that complicated.
It’s called I love my kids
enough to cook for them.
No matter how else I screw up,
I know one thing.
As long as I feed everyone
til I die
I’ll always
keep them coming
back for more.
Did I mention
that my girls
have all been fighting
over who gets
which  recipes of mine when they
get married?
I told them I would
make them each their own
recipe box.
Maybe I won’t have to cook til I die
after all.

One comment

  1. I am totally jealous since I just ordered pizza for my family since I am not feeling well. I hope you sign up to bring me dinner after I have my babies. 😉 I know you bake well but didn't know you could cook too. You rock!

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