I don’t know if I will ever stop calling Caroline “baby” even though she has been telling me for over a year that she isn’t a baby anymore. I always remind her that she’s “my baby.” And she is.

I am a middle child and so I know little about babyhood. In fact, I am pretty sure I came out of the womb totally grown and responsible as I had a sister one year older than me and a brother one year older than her. My next sister was born by the time I turned four and another brother shortly after her. I have always had this inner dialogue that if I wanted anything I would have to get it myself. I don’t know what it would be like to be showered with attention even though I have this super annoying inner instinct to fight for it.

Watching Caroline I am actually stunned by the reality of babyhood. She oscillates between being showered with attention, fighting for attention, and not getting any at all. It must be challenging to be the baby. She’s spoiled rotten yet kind of ignored. I can imagine that may confuse a person. I need to read up on it so I can help her be healthy in her baby syndrome. I don’t want her to grow up all confused and needy.

Today Caroline started her second year of pre-school. I love the mornings that I can go and do whatever I want alone for a few hours. Unlike other parents that talk about missing their kids while they are at school, I look forward to Caroline’s kindergarten and beyond so that I will have a little more time to pursue my own goals without kids at feet. Call me selfish. I think you can just call me honest.

I took a video of Caroline this morning asking her about preschool.

Caroline in her babyhood has taken a real liking to the video camera lately. Here are some other vlogs that she has created. I make a true to life cameo in the first soccer video with my mean adamant mom-voice “NO.” It think I have perfected it if I do say so myself.

I am sure you noticed that I have taught my daughter to chomp on her gum just like me. Just a few weeks ago while driving alone in the car along a country road with no radio reception, I rolled down the windows and chomped away, just because LG wasn’t there to tell me the habit was annoying. It is amazing how chomping helps one to have something on which to focus when bored.

Other side-note: I so loved the Latin man on the sideline at the game. He just seemed to make the soccer game that much more authentic. It was fun to be close to him for one half of the game, but the second half we moved to the other side as his incessant cheering became a little cumbersome even with his fun futbol-inspired accent.