Beer alternative.

We had a talk with our daughters last night about what it means to be worthy to go to the temple. (For those of you who aren’t Mormon and are curious as to what it means to be worthy to go to the temple, I suggest you read this.) Here’s the conversation.

Me: “So girls do you know what you have to do to be able to go to the temple someday?”

Abigail: “Yeah, we have to keep the commandments?”

Me: “So, what exactly are you not supposed to do if you want to be able to go in the temple someday?”

Abigail: “What?”

Me: “Well, dad is about to tell you.”

LG: “You have to keep the Word of Wisdom, The Law of Chastity, pay your tithing, have a testimony.”

Abigail: “What is the law of chastity again?”

LG: You know, it’s the law that says you can’t have sex until you get married.”

Abigail: (embarrassed) “Oh yeah.”

Later in the conversation. Thank me for sparing you the details of the sex talk.

LG: “So girls, just don’t have sex and no drinking Budweiser, and you’ll be worthy to go to the temple someday. Got it?”

Abigail: “What’s butt weiser?”

I guess we’ve been successful in indoctrinating our kids to not want that drink. Who wants to drink anything that originated from the butt plant?

LG: “And girls, trust me on this, it’s a lot easier to not have sex after you are married than before you are married.” (with a wink in my direction)

Abigail: “Yeah, that’s because you have all these kids now.”



  1. if you drink anything from the butt… you’ll be the wiser for sure. Üexcellent post!ToOdLeS.ShEiLAps. do you know that song?you don’t bring me flowers?this is the version you have left me with… you don’t leave no comments… anymore. Ü

  2. I am laughing out loud over here. I think Abigail’s comment may have just enabled me to give up beer altogether…”butt weiser” just does not sound appealing. hee hee…The sex after marriage comment is pretty good too….LOL!

  3. So I found your blog from a mutal friend and you crack me up! I hope you don’t mind but I have to share the laughter and so I put you on my list of faves on my blog! Just consider me one of your many blog stalkers I guess~Dannie

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