FunnyBlog

Change
Guess what?
We all screw up.
It’s a fact of life.
The good news is that we can always improve.
We can change.

We fall down.
I’ve learned the hard way
that we shouldn’t focus on the fall.
But, getting back up.
I recently read this quote by
“No one who cannot rejoice in the discovery
of his own mistakes deserves to be called a scholar.”
At church a while back,
my friend Brenda taught me something profound.
I was lamenting about how
I always have so much self improvement to make.
It gets overwhelming.
She said,
“That shouldn’t make you sad or discouraged.
You should be encouraged.
Because the fact that you know
what to improve upon
means that you are
in tune with the voice of God.
He is talking to you.
And you are hearing it.”
How wise.
My favorite quote last week:
“The best way to make
permanent change for good
is to make Jesus Christ
your model
and His teachings
your guide for your life.” ~ Scott
I wrote it on a piece of construction paper.
And tacked it above my computer.
Funny, LG walked by as I tacked.
He questioned,
“Is that for me?”
“No, it’s for me, silly.”
We all need to change.
Embrace it.

Self-Employment

For the past two years,
LeGrand has been running his own law practice.
It is a two years that I would
NEVER want to live over again.
LeGrand has done a great job.
His practice has been successful.
He really did amazing things.
He’s accomplished a lot of his goals.
And he has gotten to know himself
more than ever before.
I bet he has been significantly more successful
than most people who start a practice
right out of school.
But it’s all because of God’s grace.
And it does no good for anyone
to compare themselves to others.
Better than monetary success,
LG has helped a lot of people.
And that makes LeGrand
really happy and proud.
He could keep going,
and we would only get richer.
But, life isn’t about riches all the time.
Sometimes it’s about having some vacation time.
I can’t wait for the day that LG clocks out
and leaves work at work.
I want to be the wife that looks forward to
that summer vacation.
Instead of feeling guilty for asking the man
to take a day off of work.
I couldn’t be happier,
that it’s time for the next adventure.
Because the stress that LG has carried around,
has about killed his wife.
And I am pretty tough.
Thanks be to God
for letting us know
that we can finally move on
from our second two year mission.
Or maybe it’s our third mission.
The first being our literal church missions.
(Where we met by the way)
The second being having all of our children
while finishing college.
And the third being the law practice.
I wonder what the 4th will be?
Here’s to NOT minding your own business.
And going back to working for the man.
I know that LeGrand will find the perfect job.
People would be stupid not to hire him.
He’s a genius.
What does this have to do with church anyway?

Large Families
This is an opinion post.
I just want your opinion.

Here’s a disturbing news story about a lady
who was dead for 18 months
and was only found after her house sold.

There are really great promises about having a big family.

One of those is going to be
that I am not going to die
and not be discovered for 18 months.

My kiddos may send me to a nursing home,
but they aren’t going to forget about me.

Just like I will never forget my parents.
And neither will my 6 siblings.

I would love to be able to handle 7 children,
like my mom.
Sometimes 4 feels like my max.
I am 36.
I could crank out a couple more.
Especially when looking at this.

It feels like 4 children doesn’t really define a large family.
I think that 5 is large.
But, 6 seems to be the magic number for large.
What do you think?

Proud Mothering Moments

When I was a young mother,
I screwed up all the time.
I would like to think that I screwed up
then more often than I do now.
I laugh as new mothers ask me
how I do so well with 4 children.
I laugh because they don’t believe me
when I tell them that there’s a learning curve.
To prove my point, here’s a great story.
One time, LG and I went shopping with Abigail.
Remember, we only had ONE child.
Maybe two, I can’t remember if Sophia was born yet.
We went to Utah’s finest hub for young poor college families:
The Wal-Mart in Orem, UT.
Abigail started whining that she needed
to go to the bathroom.
We cut our shopping short,
and checked out quickly.
LG was assigned to take the things to the car.
And, I took Abigail to the bathroom at the front of the store.
I took her in a stall and got her situated.
When all of the sudden,
a wave of “I need to relieve myself too”
washed over me.
I told Abigail to stay in her stall
and that I was going to run into the stall next to her.
I talked to her as I ran over and the whole time
I was doing my business.
In the middle of this, I see her feet hit the floor.
I adamantly encourage her to wait for me.
I tell her to sit back down.
She took a step.
I tell her to stand still.
She keeps walking.
I see her feet run out of her stall.
I don’t know if she can hear me.
I start raising my voice.
“Abigail, Abigail, mommy is right here.”
“Abigail, come here.”
I notice that she left her pants and her underwear
on the floor of her stall.
I hurry and pull my pants up.
And run.
I don’t even think I flushed the toilet.
Gross.
By the time I got to her,
she had walked out of the store.
With no pants on.
So much for Code Adam.
So much for Wal-Mart greeters
watching for suspicious activity.
And so much for me being
a natural at raising kids from my first.
And I have never EVER tried to go to the bathroom
at the same time as one of my toddlers
ever since that horrifying day at Wal-Mart
back in 2000 or 2001.
And one lesson, after another, and another,
has made me into the amazing mother
that I am today.
And lucky for me,
none of the rest of my lessons,
consisted of me
running after a naked child
in the parking lot
of Wal-Mart.
Did I mention that she had pooped
and hadn’t been wiped?
And the same goes for me.

Fear is the opposite of faith.
Matthew 8: 26 “Why are ye fearful, O ye of little faith?”

When we have that kind of faith and trust in the Lord,
we have true security and serenity in our lives. ~ Oaks
Fear is the antithesis of faith. ~ Hinckley
Recently, a friend of mine revealed a new concept to me.
All humans are either driven by anger or fear.
Interestingly enough,
this is in direct correlation with our flight or fight modes.
If you fear, you want to flight.
Anger makes you want to fight.
I have been reading some evidential arguments
for fighting being a healthier reaction to terrorism.
In fact anger is a driving emotion.
It builds energy.
While fear is an energy draining emotion.
It creates digression.
No energy.
It made me think of this poem that I wrote.
I will choose the faith, not the threatening fear.
Observe the children at play and not their danger.
I will hear the laughter, not see the tear.
The love of a friend, not the threat of a stranger.

Life is not lived if we choose to retreat.
If all we see is wrong then we have failed our test.
Let us not all give up, stay home, be beat.
Choose to live and give and take from life the best.


It’s not my best work,
but nonetheless telling of my unchosen emotion.
I don’t like fear.
I am an anger girl for sure.
I’m not chiding on fear.
I get it.
Fearful people have their place in this world.
They are needed to balance out us angry folk.
But, what if we all tried to overcome
either our anger or our fear?
My husband is full of fear at times.
He has come to learn of it’s debilitating effects.
He is overcoming it.
I just asked him if he had fear conquering strategies.
“Only one”, he said.
“Fear is the opposite of faith. I am going to choose to have faith.”
I asked him how that translated into
conquering the fear in those moments
that seem to have nothing to do with faith.
You know, like, how does he find the courage
to fix that dishwasher when he has never done it before
and he’s afraid because he doesn’t know what he is doing?
What does that have to do with faith?
He didn’t answer.
My thought is that if we have faith in God,
he will give us faith in our own abilities.
So, back to the picture above.
Sophia hates to have her picture taken.
People trying to force her to get her picture taken
isn’t so good for the final shot.
I think we are like that.
We have to choose to have faith.
When we choose it, we open ourselves up to God.
And we will get the perfect final picture.
And then we can look straight into
the lensof whatever fear we have,
and smile.
Because we know that God is over all.
And even if that picture isn’t the way we wanted it to be.
Or even if we are getting a picture,
we never wanted at all.
It will be God’s will,
and that is all that matters.
Because he knows what is best for us.
And when we believe in Him,
we can have trust.
Perfect trust.
And then we will also have peace.
And interestingly enough.
I would say that peace is the opposite of anger.
Hmmm.