My own worst enemy

I’ve been reading the most excellent book
(review coming soon)
It chronicles near-death
experiences of Mormon pioneers
and it has been life altering for me
as I have pondered
the after-life.
What will it be like for
me to meet my maker
and account for mortality?
I really really hope that
the good outweighs the bad.
As I recently talked with a friend
who has anorexia,
we discussed
how we all seem
to just transfer
one bad behavior to the next.
She started struggling with anorexia
when she was overcoming
a spending problem.
I can’t seem to be disciplined
enough to stay under budget
while also staying under calorie allotment.
And forget being happy and kind
and under budget and under calorie.
It’s going to take me a lifetime
to conquer all of the above
at the same time.
But this morning
while running
I had an epiphany.
It comes from

Mosiah 3:19

19 For the natural man is an enemy to God, and has been from the fall of Adam, and will be, forever and ever, unless he yields to the enticings of the Holy Spirit, and putteth off the natural man and becometh a saint through the atonement of Christ the Lord, and becometh as a child, submissive, meek, humble, patient, full of love, willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon him, even as a child doth submit to his father.

Like a ton of bricks
it hit me all at once.
My mortal body
is my own worst enemy.
My whole purpose 
on this earth
is to show that my spirit
can be in charge
of my body.
My body is dead
without my spirit.
My spirit (me) is what makes 
me (my body) do or not do anything.
When I struggle with stuff
it’s not my spirit,
it’s the flesh.
The flesh is naughty.
The spirit is perfect.
They are always at odds
with one another.
“Hey body Alice
quit eating so much.”
“Shut up spirit Alice,
you’re so goody-goody.
We’re gonna
eat drink and be merry til we die.”
“Bad idea body Alice,
your spirit
wants to have its glorified form
and it knows a whole lot
more than you do.
I’m smarter.
I’m better
and my whole goal 
is to make you perfect.
I’m in charge
so put that doughnut down.
The flesh is weak,
the spirit is strong.
This may seem so simple
to you all,
but it is an epic
that I aim
to use
from now on
when trying to conquer
my transfer of
bad behaviors.
When my flesh is weak
I plan to tap into
that strong strong strong
and I plan to utilize
the God of all spirits
to help me 
whip that body into shape
more often.

One comment

  1. I've been reading a book called Visions of Glory, that has been helping me understand this concept more. I thought is was kinda cool that this is what you are learning this week too. We must be taking the same spiritual learning track this week. 🙂 thanks for your insights!

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